I am no stranger to fear, in fact my entire motto has been "I don't want to live my life feeling I've missed out!"
My earliest moments of facing my fears was at the age of 3 where I would play a game of crossing a busy street right in front of our house. The speed limit was 50, so you get an idea of how fast these cars were going. I know what you are thinking..."Where were your parents?"
I am sure they were in the house but I was so focused on taking on a lofty goal.
I would look left and then right and tell myself it was OK to cross the road. My mind felt like it was very adult-like having the awareness to go through mental routine.
This would go on for a few minutes until I felt I mastered it.
Looking back, I don't think that was probably the wisest thing to do at 3 years old but it did teach me a lesson on breaking through fear. In fact, if that wasn't enough when my family moved a year later I did it again and this time my father found out. I got in big trouble too.
Fast forward today my breakthroughs around fear have helped me shape who I am as a leader, speak, author, and coach as my mission has impacted clients globally.
I've realized that no one gets anywhere without breaking through fear. I get emails all of the time from women telling me they want to grow their business to the next level yet they will not take the action necessary because of their FEAR.
Here are some fear based answers I've heard over the years that holds women back from truly stepping into being a leader in their industry:
They don't invest in getting help. There's never going to be a good time to invest in yourself and those that see themselves as leaders find the money to do it. Where are you really spending your money? Are you spending your money on consumables like clothes, shoes, and vacations instead of valuing yourself enough to invest in YOU? You have the money for what you value. Tell me what you're spending your money on and I will tell you what you value the most.
They share their story as to why it won't work. Your beliefs create your story so any story you keep perpetuating will run your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind is running the show as it's responsible for 95% of your beliefs, habits, and behaviors.
That being said, you must get out of your story which means creating a new level of mind. This is why you feel uncomfortable when you do something that is out of your normal set of behaviors. Your brain becomes chemically addicted to the story so trying to change it feels uncomfortable.
However, if you want to go to the next level you must identify your story and breakthrough the fear. It's the only way you can change and grow to the next level of your business vision.
They will tell me they will think about it. If you have to think about you're not ready to go to the next level. You haven't made a decision yet that you will do this 100% and you have to be ALL IN!
So how do you get out of the fear and into a bigger vision and version of yourself?
3 things you can do to accelerate your VISION
1. Get clear on what you really want for your business and life. I know this sounds simple but every single client I've worked with even already high-achieving successful women have some fuzziness in their vision. The clearer you are the easier it will be to take action. Getting clear will also calm your nerves and help dissolve the fear. All too often women get fearful because there's no clear cut plan in place. Since we are order seeking organisms having a sense of clarity downshifts our busy brains. Start writing it down, and stop focusing on your marketing funnel. The marketing and content creation is secondary to your vision.
2. Chuck it down. In my LIVE Your La Dolce Vita LIFE in 30 Days course, I show you how to take your big goal and chunk it down into bite size goals. You want to focus on breaking your big vision into 90 days or less of actionable steps.
When I work with clients privately here's what we do:
Create your BIG VISION (What do you really want to do, be, and have?)
Year 1 goal
See how chunking down your vision can dissolve your fear?
IMAGINE being able to focus on a few things every day and in 30 days you're already hit your first goal.
This is the power of being in the FLOW and feeling like your business and life are on track.
You can use this same process in any area of your life too!
3. Invest in a mentor. This is the fastest path to growth. I hired my first mentor years ago and it transformed my beliefs and business beyond what I thought was possible. It wasn't cheap either but well worth it. The power of coaching is being able to fast track your success because you're drawing from the wisdom of someone that has already done it or is an expert in their field. There's never a good time and you'll never be ready. The key is to make a decision and go for it. If you want to be the best you must become a better version of yourself. This is called mastery. MASTERY = INFLUENCER
I will write a separate article on mastery later.
The results of hiring a mentor:
One client went from $25k to $45k in 8 weeks. She was already making great money but I helped her to master one simple thing around her fear with sales and gave her a mindset upgrade.
Another client I had was a teacher who had a broke mentality around money. In just 8 weeks they generated $10k. This is entrepreneur didn't have an established business either. (No list, No website!)
One of my elite clients will be reaching the $500k mark which is super cool and the biggest thing I helped her with is breaking through her fear. I had her do things that felt uncomfortable but at the same time they were aligned with her message and mission.
The bottom line is if you want to become a leader you will experience one or more of the forms of fear.
Fear of success
Fear of failure
Fear of not feeling smart enough
Fear of not having the health or vitality
Fear of an authority figure
Fear of losing a loved one.
Reaching that next level can feel fearful, sometimes painful, and it feels like you're living in the void of uncertainty but this is where the transformation takes place. You must be able to LEAP before you're ready. The secret is just make a decision of what bold goals you want to go after. The decision comes first! When you make a decision that's when the MAGIC happens. You will attract the right people and resources because you're taking a stand for you!